Objectification of women and obsession with her physical beauty are very old problems. But, instead of pulling ourselves up, we are just digging ourselves deeper and deeper into the problem. Obsession with physical beauty has become an epidemic and unfortunately, millions of us across the globe are victims.
How do we define a beautiful woman?
Tall, skinny, flawless Fair skin, silky hair and sharp
facial features..etc
How many women are born perfectly beautiful (as per above definition,
with no single flaw)?
May be <5%.
Then, why to be harsh on girls for their genetic lottery?
Most of the characteristics we consider as measures of beauty come from genes, something a woman has no control over. It is pure
luck, decided by nature. But we ridicule girls for their physical flaws.
Judging a woman for her external beauty starts very early, right from birth. When a new child comes to greet the world, the first thing we want to find out is, “Girl or Boy” and next thing is skin colour and more specifically if it is a girl, because fair is considered beautiful. As the girl grows, friends, family, relatives and even strangers have a say in how she looks or she should look, they may not be rude, but it definitely hurts at some level :
“The younger sister is fair, she will easily get married... But
her parents will have tough time with the elder one”
“Her eyes are not beautiful as her mother’s...”
“She got that job only because of her looks”
“Oh my god, you are not married yet, and you gotta grey hair?”
“Look at your height, dear…This dress is for long legged girls...”
“Dark-coloured girls should try only light colours.. ”
The list would go on….
We reached a point, where we think, it is completely
okay to publicly comment on woman’s bod. She is not a doll or a painting
in magazine; she has ears, heart and feelings too. When I was a kid, I was constantly compared to my cousin who was fairer than me. I grew with a notion that I was not beautiful because I am not fair skinned. May be some of you were strong, but I was emotionally weak as a teenager . I was one of those many young girls and women who cry to sleep helplessly over something that is not in their control.
While some girls bounce back and prove their strength somewhere else, but research says, many of them would turn bitter towards others, and revenge by pointing out flaws in someone else they come across. End result, we have a society in which 8 in every 10 women are un-happy with at least one part of their body. Few years back, my grand mother told me, women who are happy about themselves, make happy homes. It hurts to see
While some girls bounce back and prove their strength somewhere else, but research says, many of them would turn bitter towards others, and revenge by pointing out flaws in someone else they come across. End result, we have a society in which 8 in every 10 women are un-happy with at least one part of their body. Few years back, my grand mother told me, women who are happy about themselves, make happy homes. It hurts to see
A mother who constantly monitors what her to-be-married
daughter eats,
A friend who wouldn’t want to be clicked pictures,
A cousin who is not excited about trying a new dress,
A colleague who sits to herself and doesn’t mingle with
others,
A neighbour who suspects her husband every minute,
An aunt who never attends any of the family functions,
Another grumpy aunty who finds a physical flaw in every girl
of the family,
A teenage girl who spends more than 10K a month on cosmetics
and beauty treatments and
A 5+ year young girl who bugs her mother, “Why am I not fair
like you? Why didn’t you eat fruits for me when I was inside you, don’t you
love me?”
If someone is benefited from this external beauty concept, it is billion-dollar beauty industry and entertainment media. Unfortunately, they would keep bombarding us with the pictures of supposed-to-be perfect photo-shopped women. They wouldn't change, but we can change ourselves.
If someone is benefited from this external beauty concept, it is billion-dollar beauty industry and entertainment media. Unfortunately, they would keep bombarding us with the pictures of supposed-to-be perfect photo-shopped women. They wouldn't change, but we can change ourselves.
It is not important to stress ourselves to fit into that narrow definition of physical beauty. It is not arrogance, but confidence, if you see yourself beautiful. Let us love our bodies as they are, because it is where we have to live in for many more years to come. If you keep your body and mind clean and healthy, you will always find yourself and the person next to you beautiful!!! If you are a man who is reading this, tell women (your wife, mother, sister, daughter and friends) in your lives at least once in a week, that they are beautiful for what they are. If you are a woman, next time, when you hear someone judge you or someone else, tell them it is rude and unacceptable. Speak out. It is not okay to speak about our body without our consent. Learn to ignore such comments and move on.
The intrinsic value of a person is much higher than his/her physical
appearance. It is not important to stress ourselves to fit into that narrow definition of beauty, developed by some pseudo intellectuals. Every woman is beautiful.
PS : It is unfortunate that this beauty epidemic is now spreading to males as well. The content of this blog applies to men as well, except for few examples.
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