Learn Telugu Series | Animal names in Telugu for NRI Kids

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"Dear Darling daughter"- A letter from a mother to her late daughter

My darling daughter,

As your mother, I understand how much pain you had to go through, that let you decide to take your life, but with it gone the smile on our lips and sleep on our eyes!! I will not ask you "why you did it?”. I just request you to come back and fill this void in our lives, with your laughter!! I know you wouldn't come back, our love is not powerful enough to bring you back, because our love couldn't stop you from tightening that evil rope around your neck!! Didn't we cross your mind at least for a second? Is love of your parents so weak? Didn't you love us enough to live your life, if not for the world, at least for your mom and dad?

The house that was filled with laughter, conversations and fights is now dead silent!! I and your dad do not tease each other anymore, and we do not even talk to each other. We just stare deep into each other's eyes, knowing only the other person can truly empathize with the loss. We do not know how to console the other!! Since 25 years of our marriage, we have been each other's strength, but we do not feel intimate anymore. I feel alone, very alone. Your dad sleeps in a separate room now to hide those tears from me, but comes to our old bed room every hour to check only if I am alive. Little did he know that I keep checking him every other hour!! How should I console 50 year old man, who lived only for his family and thought his daughter is everything!! We have become living dead-bodies. We inhale but we do not breathe!! We stare but we do not see!! We hear but we do not listen!!

You should have given us one chance to stand with you, to reduce your sufferings!! One single chance to get you back into our lives!! We would have given our crores, education, status and everything to be with you, nothing ever mattered and matters more than you!! You thought, we would be hurt if you let us know your problem and now you had given us pain time can’t heal. We would have fought with entire world for u.

Some said, these are testing times and everything would be okay!! I wanted to shout on top of my voice, "No, it can never be okay. We lost our daughter, our dreams and our life, everything!!" How can anyone understand the pain? We lost our only daughter, we cannot blame god because our own daughter had taken her life!! Some mocked us as failed parents: we did not provide you supportive environment. Who would video-tape our lives to tell them how good we were as family and I don't even want to prove anything to anyone!! Their words do not hurt me anymore. Some consider us unfortunate while some consider us bad-omen, they do not visit us anymore!! I see you in every other child!! I long to hug a baby, but no mother ever brings her child close to me as I am a cursed mother!! They are afraid, my dirty touch would take away their baby away!! You never let anyone say a thing about us, and now where are you?!! 

The greeting card you stuck to my mirror reads out loud, "Amma, you are the best mom in the world!! I would do anything for you!!" Couldn't you just live for me, for your best mom? If you loved me so much, why did you take that precious life I almost died to give you? 

The people who hurt you and forced you to choose death over life might have felt guilty for harassing u or they might be sadistically happy that they won over you!! I do not care about their feelings, at the end, they forgave themselves and forgot you!! They are living with their families!! For them, you were a momentary part of life, but for us you are the life!! We die each day in your memories. You know them only for a year, but us for 25 years!!  Who should be more important - people who hate you or people who love you? You shattered our own happy family, you chose the easiest path leaving your old parents to dread the toughest path!!

Every morning, your dad and I make a choice - to live or to die!!? Every night silently we pray to god to give us the strength to live one more day!! Your memories would never leave us, they keep haunting us each day!! I just wish no parent ever has to go through the loss of a child!!

And now, I read another story of a parent just like me!! 

To every other daughter like mine or Rishiteshwari,

Your parents love you no matter what!! Some parents show it, and some do not :

They might have been too harsh to you at times

They might have been too busy to spend time with you
They might have been aggressive, shouted on you for every silly thing

They might have compared you with someone better;

They might have scolded you for not performing well in exams

They might not have agreed to your love marriage

They might have convinced you to re-establish your failed marriage!!

But every parent loves their child!! Their actions might be wrong, but their intentions for you are always right!! You are their world. From the moment you were born, two people sacrificed their luxuries and dedicated their lives to you!! God makes mothers go through enormous physical and mental pain to give birth to a child, but he doesn't give her strength to bear with loss of a child!!

If you have a problem and if you cannot handle it anymore, please talk to your parents and tell them what your mental state is!! They would do anything for you!! Anything!! Your bad grades, your assaulted body, your failed love, your marital discords, your financial problems, ragging, social bullying...Your parents would find a solution. If there is no solution and in the worst case, they = would be ready to start from scratch with zero bank-balance, in a new place, treating you just like their just-born child!! But, please give them one last chance... Remember!! No reason can be strong enough reason to take that life, your parents have struggled to give you!!

~Sharada 
A lonely mother of a beautiful daughter, Anu!! 
A powerless mother who cannot make world a better place for daughters, but just wishes daughters to stay stronger for their parents!! 
A wishful mother who thinks this letter would help few other daughters and their parents!!  

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A dinner date with the other woman I always loved besides my wife!!

We were a nuclear family of three. It was three months since our only son, Karthik, had moved abroad for higher studies. Happy for him, but we missed him every day. Our home has lost its laughter, radiance and happiness;  it started to look like a brick cuboid!! We felt lonely, especially my wife who had quit her job when my son was born. I could feel her pain, I wanted to comfort her. So, I proposed a dinner date and a movie!!

But, my wife wanted me to take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She reasoned, “I love you, but I know this other woman would love to spend some time with you.” I asked if three of us can go together, she said "No, It would be different when it is just you two!" I thought she might have called any of my old girl friends, I was not in touch with! She dialed her and asked me to invite her. 

I said, "Hello" and the lady said, " Beta, whats wrong, aren't you well?" 

It was my mother on the other side.

I looked at my wife, she gestured me to continue

“Mom, Shall we go out for dinner this Friday?!!” I asked her. 

She thought about it for a moment, and then said, “Did I ever say 'No' to you?!!”

My wife and I moved into a separate house three months after our marriage because we wanted privacy and my parents never opposed!! Two years later, my father died and my mother started living alone in the same house. In the beginning, we used to visit her every weekend; weekly became monthly and monthly became occasionally, after I moved to other end of the city. I have my reasons : Tired, Busy with work, Busy with kids, Family Time!! She never insisted us to visit her, she was worried that I had to drive so long!!

That Friday after work, I drove over to pick her up. When I arrived at her (no more our) house, I found her arranging flowers at my father's photo. She draped herself in her favorite red saree that I gifted her with my first salary. She smiled at me. Even at the age of 65, she has that same spark in her eyes when she smiles.   

We went to that restaurant where we used to go frequently as a family when I was a child. She said, she would place the order. She didn't even look at menu, she ordered all my favorites when I was a kid, and they are still my favorites except I became more conscious of my intake. During the dinner, we had talked about many things -  recent events of each other's life, Karthik, my friends, movies and many more. 

When we sat in the car, I asked her if I can take her on a long drive. She didn't ask "Where?". We drove 20 miles, straight to my house!! Its been many years since my mother visited us, always we go to her place. 

When my wife opened the door, my mom hugged her and said, "Thank you!!"

My wife responded in a low voice, "Sorry, it took us so many years!!"

My mother made my house, a home again!! She filled the void in our home and also in our hearts!! There are silent smiles, louder laughter, fresh aroma from puja mandir, soothing music, old recipes on dining table and new plants in our garden. My wife found a wonderful companion for cooking, shopping and watching TV serials!! Their favourite pass-time is skimming through shadi websites for suitable bride for our joint family!! 

How much I missed my mother, especially her beautiful smile!! I thank my wife every day for that beautiful dinner night!!

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Watch Bahubali with your family to experience strength of our warriors, power of women in ancient India and grandeur of Indian cinema!!

Bahubali, the biggest Indian motion picture is now in theaters!! It is a historical fiction Telugu-Tamil bilingual dubbed into Hindi, Malayalam and French!! If you haven’t seen it yet, book your tickets to live through grandeur of medieval times of India, experience strength of our warriors and understand power of women in olden days. It is a must movie for every macho man, who thinks listening to woman is a sign of weak man. The movie shows you how women were power centers in ancient India, how mothers/wives were treated in ancient India, and that a woman & man complement each other, neither of them is superior.

I am not a movie buff, I selectively watch movies and this is the first time, I am writing about one. But #Bahubali is not just a movie, it is an experience!! More than grandeur/visuals of the movie, I liked the characters. Typically, Indian movies show hero as the strongest, most handsome and most generous – all the goodness in the world in one man. But, in #Bahubali, every character is important, every character connects with you and talks to you:

A magnanimous queen who can side mother& wife in her for the welfare of her kingdom (Ramya Krishnan as Sivagami)

A caring mother for whom her child is her world (Rohini as Sanga – Shivudu’s mother),

A loyal servant – Highly skilled, dissatisfied but loyal (Sathyaraj as Katappa),

A captivated & tortured queen – an epitome of self-respect (Anushka Shetty as Devasena)

A shrewd father who wanted to live his life again through his son (Nassar as BjjalaDeva )

A powerful warrior with thirst for power (Rana Daggupati as Bhallaladeva)

A noble king who knows how to play his strengths to protect his subjects (Prabhas as Bahubali)

A son/lover who could do anything for his mother and girl (Prabhas as Shivudu)

Spoiler Alert: No Comedy track, you just smile/cry but you wouldn’t laugh!!

Well, I felt Avanatika character was the weakest in the movie. I didn’t connect with Avantika and Tamannaah didn’t fit the role of Avantika.

I do not want to be a spoiler, so I am not talking about specific scenes. Do watch it yourself!! With IMDB rating of 9.4/10 (highest for an Indian film), you wouldn’t be disappointed at all.

80% of all Indian commercial movies beautify woman and in many movies heroines are no brainers, they are present only to virtually & visually romance with viewers (including a few of Rajamouli’s own movies). In many of our families, we think listening to woman is sign of a weak man, but this movie shows you that strength of a man is in respecting women. You need to listen to a woman when she has a point, and a woman has to be strong to drive her point.  Not just in Palace, even in tribal setup, villagers respect Sanga’s words and feelings!! A man beheads another for the vulgar comments he made on a woman (even before knowing she was his mother).

If you keep comparing this movie with counterparts from Hollywood, you would lose what movie had to offer you – that emotional connect with characters!! Given all the constraints, it is a great Indian movie, which would stand tall in Indian Cinema books. If you think, only “Hero” should have 70% of the screen-time, this movie is not for you!!

Some said, Bahubali script is weak. I didn’t find it weak, every story can be narrowed down to three feelings – Love, Revenge and Call for Duty – so is Ramayana, Mahabharatham… and is Bahubali. It is not about content of the story but it is about how you tell a story!! Rajamouli is a spectacular story teller. Bahubali is not an entertainer, you need to use your brain a lot. There is no chronological order, it moves back and forth in time and place – you need to connect the dots. Especially, you need to do lot of brain work to understand the war strategy.

Preferably, watch it with family and let your children learn about ancient culture, our powerful warriors, and war strategies. Let them understand how women were treated in ancient times, at least some of them would understand that women are not weaker sex and learn to respect women when they turn into adults.

All said, Bahubali – 2 looks evern more promising as you get to see more of Bahubali, Bhallaladeva, Devasena, Katappa and Sivagami.

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Flipkart Maternity Benefits : Bold and Welcoming move!!

Flipkart, one of the e-Commerce giants of India has raised bar very high for other Companies in attracting and retaining Women employees.

Snapshot of Flipkart new maternity package :

1. Six Months paid Maternity leave
2. Up to four months of flexible working option with full pay.
3. Extended maternity leave up to 1 year of career break without pay
4. Transport reimbursement benefit of Rs.600 per day during the last two months of pregnancy
5. Reserved parking slot for women 2 months before and after child delivery
6. Working on proposal with Famous day-care centres for discounted prices to its employees. 

Why such benefits??

Every woman loves shopping!! At least window shopping!!  Flipkart wants to aggressively market itself to women shoppers and to fully understand the psyche of women and design programs that best attract women, Flipkart needs strong representation of women in its workforce. Currently, Flipkart has no woman in its board of directors. The company is planning to recruit women for its senior leadership roles, and also nurture women talent within. Hence, the bold move - Benefits that stand out from regular and mandated 3 months paid maternity leave!!

Thinking of Change!!? Flipkart is waiting for you!! 

Flipkart has announced itself as the destination for young & talented women, many of whom have to drop the ball for Childcare. Not just that, the announcement of these benefits are applauded by many of its customers, and Flipkart has entered into good books of its women customers. This strong and positive brand image would definitely reflect in its online sales. 

So ladies, if you are planning to switch careers (or planning to start a family in near future), let Flipkart be your first choice!! It is not easy to work after marriage, especially after kids, you need very strong support from your colleagues and employer. 

What next ?!! You might be regularly following Flipkart, Amazon and Snapdeals counter marketing trolls. Well, Flipkart has opened new space for marketing. I hope that Amazon and Snapdeal would respond with equally good, if not better maternity benefits. 

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If marriage is a solution to rape, how can Marital rape be ever a crime?

On a lazy Sunday morning, first thing I read is this case where a Court considers 'Marriage' between rape victim and her rapist, a "Happy Conclusion"!! How can a woman be ordered / requested / convinced to marry a man who sedated her, pounced on her like an animal, attacked her parents and denied any involvement until DNA report of his daughter confirmed it!!?? Is the judge helping the victim or punishing her for bringing it to courts? Isn't it a license for him to abuse her for her entire life?

The case is about a woman, now in her 20s from a remote village, who was raped by a man 6 years ago 2 days before her SSC exams. She also had a 6 yr old daughter out of this rape. She has fought in courts for justice, and is still fighting for her dignity in society. Court proposed Marriage!! She neither agreed to marry her rapist nor accept any money in compensation, despite her poor financial status!! His place is behind the bars, not in her house. Kudos to her spirits!! She didn't give up, she is going to tell her daughter that her father is a rapist. I agree, family with mom and dad is good for any child, but not a Rapist Father, he is more harm to her daughter!! I love this woman for her stand.

She is truly an inspiration to many highly educated stalwarts of our society. 

As long as we see MARRIAGE as a solution to a CRIME of rape, we wouldn't see MARITAL Rape as a CRIME. 

Suppose, if a woman meets with an accident because the other vehicle driver was drunk, and gets seriously wounded, we would sympathize with her & her family but if same woman is raped by another drunk/sober man, we blame her. We scar her. We boycott her & her family. We look at Rape as Loss of Dignity of Woman, it is not considered as wound to her body, but a scar on her character. She would become unfit for marriage and unsuitable company of her friends/cousins!! One heinous act ruins her complete life!In almost all the cases, a woman is blamed atleast partially - for being provactive, for not being alert or for being out at odd timings!! When we make victim part of the crime, a Rape case would become more of a conflict between two individuals and less of a crime committed by one single party. With such understanding of rape, marriage would seem amicable solution.

If forced sex is precursor for marriage, forced sex would be always an OKAY in a marriage, and many women suffer silently!!

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Adversity makes a person stronger

"Adversity makes strong people stronger and weak people weaker!!"

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Mommy, live guilt free!!

"Good moms have sticky floors, messy kitchen, laundry piles, dirty ovens & Happy Kids"

I read this quote many times before, but it didn’t make any impression. Trashed it off as one of the lazy mommy's defensive talk!! You learn certain things, only when you experience it!! And now with 1.5 yrs toddler around, these lines have become my favourites!! How much I wish, my husband or anyone else frames this and gifts me just like that – my birthday is too far!! I want to hang this, right there – Opposite our main door, as a welcoming board to my guests, even before they look at mess around. Ofcourse, it should also remind me what is important, I want to be at peace!!

We, Women take pride in neatly decorated homes. As I write this, I remember another Telugu quote, “Intini chusi Illalini Chudu” (Translated : Even before you see the woman, you can know her from her house). Poor thing, it doesn’t take into account – Kids!! If I have to keep my house neat and clean, I should restrict freedom of my son. He is too young to understand where things should be!! He likes to keep everything on floor, – from kitchen utensils to his toys.  As long as he is happy, it shouldn't matter!! His smiles bring more peace than a clean house!! I have given up my quest for perfect home!! 

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Don't be too busy to spend with your kids!!

"Don't keep yourself too busy to play with your kids. Your time is the most precious gift you can give to your children. Never let them walk away without a smile."

I always wonder, if I spend enough time with my toddler son? I want to spend with him, atleast as much time as my parents had spent with me. It is not just about working parents, many things have changed drastically over years.  Even my parents were working, but I knew exactly when they would be home - all of us used to leave home at 8:15 AM; my brother and I used to come home by 3:30 PM and our parents by 5:30 PM, same timings every day from Monday to Saturday. Sundays, all of us would be home. Mornings – we used to watch Moghli, Sri Krishna Chandrkanta etc on Durdarshan ; Biryani for lunch; Evenings – we used to go neighborhood children park, if not we will be meeting cousins for dinner. Life was predictable - It was definitely simple, more disciplined, clean and serenely happy.

I don’t think my son has such predictability, he doesn’t know when his parents would be home for that matter if we would be home at all, as both my husband and I need to travel for business trips. Nature of our jobs has changed over time, I really wonder if we have made more progress or added more hindrance with 24*7 working hours, 64 Channel Televisions, laptops, all-in-one smartphones etc.  My parents were never aware part of this “Work-Life balance” struggle, my parents used to earn enough for their times, we were middle class family. Now, we put double the effort (may not be physically but mentally yes) and also more hours into work, but even now we earn enough for the times now, we are still a middle class family.

For good or bad, we made progress in all the fields, and I definitely can’t keep my family aloof from this DEVELOPMENT, I just need to learn survive in this chaos now. I always wish my son had more peaceful and predictable childhood, like me. 

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Make it the life you want to live!!

"Don't let anyone rob you of your imagination, your creativity, or your curiosity. It's your place in the world; it's your life. Go on and do all you can with it, and make it the life you want to live" - Mae Jemison

Every word in the above lines has profound meaning. We often let others tell us what we should do or what we shouldn't do!! Nothing can motivate us more than our dream and nothing can demotivate a person as more than our one's own disbelief in self. There is only life, we have only one chance to do what we wanted do!! Don't let your dream die with you, Give it a life to let it live beyond you. 

About Mae Jemison:  

Mae C. Jemison is an American physician and NASA astronaut. She became the first African American woman to travel in space when she went into orbit aboard the Space Shuttle Endeavour on September 12, 1992. She was born on October 17, 1956, in Decatur, Alabama. She was the youngest child of Charlie Jemison, a roofer and carpenter, and Dorothy (Green) Jemison, an elementary school teacher. After she obtained her M.D. in 1981, Jemison interned at Los Angeles County/University of Southern California Medical Center and later worked as a general practitioner. For the next two and a half years, she worked as the area Peace Corps medical officer for Sierra Leone and Liberia where she also taught and did medical research. Following her return to the United States in 1985, Jemison made a career change and decided to follow a dream she had nurtured for a long time. In October of that year, she applied for admission to NASA's astronaut training program. She holds nine honorary doctorates in science, engineering, letters, and the humanities. 

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